My bouts of insomnia are usually a combination of irrationality and inaction.

I fall asleep quickly on most nights. I usually strap on my CPAP, dive deep into my imagination, and away I go.

If I can’t sleep, there is usually something pressing on my mind. Sometimes, it is a situation entirely out of my control (which is not worth worrying about), but more often than not, it is a situation which I have at least some degree of control, but it requires putting forth an effort that I find exhausting or uncomfortable.

My insomnia is almost always self-inflicted. It’s a matter of me being victimized by myself; holding my conscious hostage. I toil about the actions I need to take when I have no control, and I deny the decisions that could be made when there is something I can do to better the situation.

More often than not, when I can’t fall asleep, it’s due to excitement, not insomnia.

A little sleep deprivation based on the anticipation of the good day ahead is not a problem, it is a gift.

Peace, Love, and all things Beef related,

Beefcake

 

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