Beefcake Episode #2

It was time for the both of us to get some rest. My son, Grayson, was probably about 5 years old at the time, and we were wrapping up long evening of father/son bonding, or “boys night”. I turned off the television, flipped off the lights, and crawled under the sheets with Grayson, as he would be crashing out in my bed tonight.

As is often the case, as soon as the lights go out, Grayson’s energy level goes up. He gets inquisitive and chatty. My son is rolling off questions like some sort of auctioneer, each inquiry more difficult than the prior. As I laid there listening to the cogs of my 5 year olds brain, hum and churn, I was unsure whether I was more exhausted, impatient, or interested in his line of questioning. There seemed to be no real end in site, and each question was only opening up another possible rabbit hole, which could take all night to explore. However, these were questions that my son wanted answered, and I cannot fault him for being inquisitive.

The Q&A session had brought me to the brink of insanity. I simply did not have the answers to any more of the questions that my 5 year old son was rattling off, like the bullets of a Gatling Gun. I had to put an end to this. It was time to get some sleep. I told Grayson that he would be afforded just one more question, and that was it….one more! I cautioned him that he needed to put some real thought in his next and final interrogation. I wanted him to be sure that he took time to think about what concern he truly wanted to address, and what was important to him. As he began to verbalize his query, I stopped him and I said, “make it count, son. Make sure that whatever you are about to ask is important to you, cause this is your last question until morning.” I asked, “Are you ready?” Grayson paused, momentarily. He took a deep breath, and he replied, “ready”. His disposition indicated with the utmost confidence that his next question was most certainly the most important concern that he had going on in his world. As I gave him the go-ahead to proceed with his final question, he said this,

“Daddy…if you were Batman, would you wear the black suit or the blue suit.”

I responded, “the black suit.”

He nodded, rolled over, and exclaimed, “me too, daddy. Goodnight.”

That was it! At this moment, the color of my Batman suit was his deepest concern.  I am a worrier. I take the smallest, teeny-tiny shred of information and place it into fictional scenarios until I have built a potential problem, that can affect my entire day. Grayson’s inquiry caused me to take a look at the things which I concern myself. While true, as an adult, my concerns are of a different nature, it does not make them more important or even more realistic. In fact, I think that his concern over the color of my Batman suit was equally as founded as the concern over another individual’s sexuality, religion, or political stance. I think that using bandwidth on costume colors is no less silly than most of what I see adults debating over, every time I turn on the television.

I think that there are many adult concerns which are far less healthy, produce far fewer results, and ultimately provide far less benefit than the color of my Batman suit. I want to spend a little extra time evaluating my concerns, my stances, and my beliefs, and determine if they are worth the emotional investment, or if they are arguments over costume colors. I want to look past my concerns and identify whether I can do anything about them or not. Is my frustration in a situation, or anger towards a given subject going to change the situation, or would I be just as well concerning myself over the color of my Batman suit?

Peace, Love, and all things Beef related,


My name is Wilson Horrell, aka “Beefcake”.  I’m a junkie turned sober that found CrossFit, running, and community to be my new addiction. I have no education or experience as a writer, and almost zero knowledge of grammar. I love sitting in front of a computer and spitting it out on paper as it goes through my brain. I hope you enjoy reading, and feel free to reach out or comment at anytime!

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