Day 21: 242.5lbs
Exercise: 5.7 miles this morning and nothing yesterday
Nutrition: Fair. Not great. Not bad
Attitude: Good

Yesterday, we cooked out on the grill. It was a lot of fun. I like having my family close and for whatever reason, I like it when everyone is stirring around. Amanda painted Grayson’s room this weekend which led to cleaning up and clearing out. Andie and Grayson were helping and not helping. Everyone was upstairs and downstairs. While I was grilling, the kids were inside and outside. I like that.

I was hungry.

All day, I was hungry.

We went to the store and picked up stuff to grill out and I knew that we would be eating good. I couldn’t help but to inventory how often the thought went through my head,

“This is a special occasion. I can eat what I want.”

That’s pretty messed up. I do this with a lot of things. I don’t know why I relate something I enjoy as a license to pig out- it is almost like I feel obligated to do it. I act as if I am the first person to ever grill out with the family so therefore I should celebrate it like Christmas….and why do I relate pigging out with Christmas? Everything is justification for me to oink and gorge- I honestly rationalize things this way.

Anyways. hopefully, I can stay conscious of my sick relationship with food although that doesn’t mean I will do anything about it, at least I am aware that I can take action if I truly decide that I want to do so.

I hope you have a great day. I hope to enjoy it. After all, it is a special occasion. It is another day to enjoy what I will.

Peace, love and all things Beef related,