I have a peanut butter problem- I like to eat it. Big, heaping gobs of it, by the ice cream scooper full. I can eat that stuff by the quart. I have to workout to a lot to combat my propensity to overeat. I have battled with weight my entire life.

I have another problem- loneliness and depression. Big heaping loads of it, by the buckets full. I can isolate myself and layer up in a vat of depression. I have to work hard and be vigilant to combat my best attempts to self-destruct and place myself in a rut.

I like to believe that I am smart enough to figure out my own problems and I don’t need help from anyone else, but nothing could be further from the truth.

This Saturday, I attended another F3 workout. One of my oldest friends was leading the group. He had us break off into teams of 3-4 people and begin the workout. There were numerous stations strategically posted within a fairly large area at Shelby Farms Park in Memphis, TN. At each station was a Tupperware dish with pieces of paper in it. A group was to randomly draw a piece of paper which had three things:
1. A certain number of reps of an intense exercise. (Push-ups, man makers, squats, etc.)
2. A specific movement by which you were to travel to the next station (Bear crawls, crab walks, lunges, etc.)
3. A topic for you to discuss with your team as you travel to your next station.

A topic?

To discuss?

Like a bunch of women?

That’s for pussies. Men don’t talk. Men grunt and say curse words and drink whiskey and eat red meat and shoot guns. Men don’t open up, especially around other men.

I talk.

I feel strongly about the importance of expressing my feelings.

I love this kind of stuff. More than exercise, I need dialogue. I have talked to enough therapists, had enough friends to listen to me, and been in enough tight spots to know the benefits of open discussion.

It was an experience. It was interesting to see how quickly the topic of “First car” can turn into a conversation about addiction and how the topic of “Favorite TV show” can shift  into a discussion of weight struggles.  It was fun to watch as shells were cracked and shields were let down. It was an experience to see how quickly a little bit of vulnerability will disarm even the hardest of men.

I appreciate dialogue. I seek connection. And, I enjoy learning about others.

We can probably do this on our own but it’s a helluva lot easier when we don’t have to.

Peace, Love, and all things Beef related,

Beefcake