Beefcake #20
Life is tough. No one will dispute this. Things get out of whack, and they can get out of whack quickly. Many times, the misery and dissatisfaction can be so subtle, and grow so slowly, that you don’t even realize that you are circling the drain. Other times, life looks you square in the eye, gives you a full frontal attack, and kicks you square in the teeth, day after miserable day. I thank God for that. I need that. It sounds strange, but I do. Picking up on subtle hints is right up there with figure skating, as far as my natural talents go.
I needed the head-on, world’s most aggressive bum-rush approach to giving clarity to what my life had become when I was in my biggest mess, to date. And, I need it in order to address most areas of dissatisfaction in my life. I circled the drain for quite some time, descending rather slowly, but the ultimate demolition, the 10ton wrecking ball, the Tyson upper-cut came on rather quickly. I wouldn’t have it any other way. I needed a good head bashing, ego crushing, soul removing, thumpin.
Life can be messy, and no one likes for others to see the dishevelment of their existence. It’s embarrassing. It’s humiliating. It’s defeating. It’s lonely. However, it’s necessary. It’s necessary if you are interested in connecting with others on a personal level.
If we are going to help people, and allow ourselves to be helped, there must first be a struggle. Nobody wants to volunteer for the struggle, but fortunately, it’s more like a draft. You don’t need to wave your hands in the air, or put out smoke signals, the problems will come to you. Big, ugly, messy problems, that appear unsolvable and are sure to last forever, they will come straight to you, free of charge.
Humans are selfish and ego-centric by nature. It’s hard for any of us to believe that we are not capable of navigating this world without the help of someone else. That’s why struggle is so important. Not only is it important, it’s essential. It’s a gift.
The mess that we make of our own lives is an opportunity. It’s an opportunity to experience growth, an opportunity to learn humility, and it’s an opportunity to become aware that we all suffer from the human condition. There is no message without a mess.
Professional football veterans don’t call the struggling rookie to tell them how great their careers have been do they? No, they share with them their experience of fumbled footballs, dropped passes, and situations where they disappointed the fans. They earned that message. They were given that gift, so they could one day pass it on to someone else who might be struggling.
Business mentors establish trust through stories of bankruptcy, poor planning, and disastrous systems that were put into place. They have to experience this before they can begin to sell someone their secret to success. Often times the secret to success, is to get busy failing. Keep failing until your out of options, and stumble upon the winning formula. It’s messy, but there’s a message there. It’s a message that will then be owned by you, and you are free to spread that message whenever it might be needed.
You know where mother’s, doctors, churches, and institutions send their drunken degenerates? They send them to AA. They toss them directly into the mess. The Mecca of messes. The messes to end all messes. Why? Cause that’s where you find the message. That’s where you find the truth, the truth that says that we are all broken. We are all messy. No one’s house is fully clean. Every, single one of us…broken.
Within the realization of our brokenness, comes awareness and compassion. This is where things start to get fun. This is the point where you realize that perfection is not even on the distant horizon. This is the place where you become aware that you are not only chasing perfection, but you are attracted to imperfection. This is the place where you start meeting people at their level, and you are grateful to be flawed.
The mess is messy. No one likes it, and it stinks like hell. It’s a lot of work and no one signs up for it. No one likes to be in it, and we would all like to avoid it. However, within that mess lies the message. The message that only you, and people like you, who have cleaned up a similar mess can tell. The message that other’s need to hear, and the message that you have earned the right to share.
Peace, Love, and all things Beef related,
Beefcake