I was once late for a friend’s intervention because I had to meet my dealer.

I remember talking to the owner of the liquor store about an acquaintances drinking problem.

I was rambling to my therapist about my family member’s anger issues.

It’s usually the times that my life is most chaotic when I invade the personal space of others and attack in the form of gossip. I have a vested interest in getting in your Kool-Aid if I don’t think mine tastes sweet enough.

Just pay attention. Watch Facebook, listen at the gym, or get a closer look at the person yapping at Sunday School class. The one who is spreading the rumors, has the highest opinions, and has the most to say about the personal life of the people around them, most likely, has the most amount of dirty laundry on their floor, bills that need to be paid, relationships that need to be mended, and drama that needs to be addressed.

Getting in someone’s personal space is the most efficient method of deflection that I know to disguise my own mess, but it is still transparent and very few are fooled by it. It would be so much easier if gossip hurt the other person that way that I intended it to and didn’t make me look like such an envious fool. Maybe technology will catch up and come up with a fix, but until then, I am stuck looking like a joke every time I spread my rumors or passive-aggressively throw my jabs.

Peace, Love, and all things Beef related,

Beefcake